


Don’t Sleep Yet

by smalltrolven



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Gen, None - Freeform, Pining Sam Winchester, pining Jo Harvelle
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:28:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,355
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28293840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smalltrolven/pseuds/smalltrolven
Summary: He wasn’t even supposed to be hunting anymore, he’d told Dean he was out, that he couldn’t trust himself. And now there’s the snow, and one more beast than he’d counted on, good times.
Relationships: Sam & Jo
Comments: 3
Kudos: 11





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Not my characters, only my words. Written for the 2020 [](https://spn-j2-xmas.livejournal.com/profile)[spn_j2_xmas](https://spn-j2-xmas.livejournal.com/) using [](https://marciaelena.livejournal.com/profile)[marciaelena](https://marciaelena.livejournal.com/) s prompt #5 as the story setting (see picture above), prompt #1 as title and as lines in the story. This story is set between 5.02 and 5.03

*****

The only sound Sam could hear was the crunch of his boots on the snow covered gravel road. The wind had disappeared once the sun had gone down. He was glad it wasn’t a full moon, less werewolves to worry about and at least there were plenty of stars lighting his way. His flashlight battery had already given up the ghost. And of course his cellphone battery had nearly given out. The cold hadn’t helped, he’d started out this journey with 100%, but had watched it dwindle. It wasn’t like there was anyone to call, or any reception out here, but still.

He kept going, up the hill, crunch crunch crunch

—snap—

He stopped, and quieted his breathing. Another

—snap—

This time from the downhill side of the road.

—Snap—

Even closer, now up above him. He turned his head, narrowing his eyes towards where he could just barely feel something watching him. There were pale flecks of light, like distant stars come down to rest in the snowy pines. His breath exhaled in a cloud around his head as he took a giant leap backwards as two somethings jumped at him from either side. He heard a crash of something hard knocking into something else that was hard, antlers or teeth maybe? There was a tussle of the two things that had jumped at him.

Then he heard a long-drawn out yell—now that was definitely a human voice. He was pretty sure these things couldn’t yodel like that. It was coming from up ahead, he could just make out a dim flashlight bobbing and the sound of running feet. It was hard to hear over all the snarls and teeth-gnashing, flesh-tearing sounds from the fight of the beasts or whatever they were. The noise of the battle seemed to fill the air around him. He tried to make out what it was, the beast he’d been hunting, or maybe fighting a bear? Or just a wildcat versus an elk? They were moving in such a quick tangle he couldn’t tell, and there was no way to shoot, because there was nowhere to really aim. It was all motion and noise and teeth and claws.

Putting his back up against the hillside he edged his way past the combat zone as quickly as possible and then took off running towards the person coming towards him. There was no telling who it was and why they were there, but he didn’t want any more civilian casualties happening.

“Turn around, run!” Sam shouted, there were noises coming fast behind him, at least one of the beasts had given up on the fight and was now following him. The person with the flashlight stopped ten feet from him and Sam saw a flash of starlight on metal as they raised a rifle.

“Get down!” the person shouted.

Sam pushed himself forward as far as possible while doing a mid-air belly flop into the piles of snow on the side of the road. He heard two rifle shots, the bullets whizzing by overhead, striking something meaty that was very very close to where he was flopped in the snow. There was a loud thud as the thing chasing him fell over into the road. It whined and growled as it kicked at the snow, trying to right itself to keep fighting.To keep trying to get to him with its sharp teeth and claws.

“Stay down!” the person ordered, cocking the rifle again. Two more shots flew past Sam, the sounds behind him stopping abruptly.

The person’s feet crunched towards him, stopping at the edge of the snowbank he’d thrown himself into.

“You okay?” the person asked in higher-pitched, feminine voice very different from the one they’d been yelling at him with.

“Jo, is that you?” Sam asked, surprised to recognize her voice coming from the mystery person who’d just saved him.

“Sam? Sam Winchester?” Jo asked, looking up at him in surprise as he stood and brushed the snow off his front.

“Why are you out here, Jo?” Sam asked.

“Duh, I’m saving your ass of course,” Jo said.

“Yeah, thanks for that,” Sam said. Dean would kill him if he knew how unprepared he’d gone into this hunt, he thought about asking her not to mention it if she ever ran into him.

“Where’s Dean at?” Jo asked.

Sam shook his head at himself, wishing he hadn’t even thought of his brother, because of course Jo would be asking about Dean given her ongoing obsession with him. “He’s not here.”

“It’s good to see you, Sam. It’s been a while, it was—” Jo said.

“Yeah, not since Colorado,” Sam said, hoping that’d be enough to get her off of the subject of Dean’s absence.

“Were you out here hunting the same thing as me?” Jo asked.

“Probably, four dead hikers, werewolfy characteristics but not full-moon timing?”

“Yup, but you’re here hunting it without Dean?” Jo asked.

“Nope, we…uh, we split up after Colorado,” Sam said.

Jo’s sharp intake of breath wasn’t unexpected. Sam knew how strange that would be to anyone that knew them, even in passing, and Jo knew them both a whole lot better.

“You’re out here hunting this thing alone?” Jo asked.

“Yeah, just the same as you, I take it. I mean, I’m not seeing Ellen anywhere am I?” Sam said.

“Well, let’s see if I even got the thing or not,” Jo said, stomping off towards the still form lying on the road. Her flashlight wasn’t bright enough to see the thing very clearly, Sam noticed as he caught up to her.

It moved as she bent over, slashing up at her, sharp claws glistening in the inadequate light. Sam brought his gun up and fired quickly, emptying his clip. The thing jerked as each bullet hit but it was still coming towards her.

Jo was fumbling at her belt for her machete, but the beast fell on her, pinning her arm, covering her body with its raggedy fur. It roared down into her face, sharp teeth shining in the light from the flashlight that she’d dropped. Sam’s arm rose up high and came down as he struck at where he thought its neck likely was located. The head rolled off, leaving a dark trail across the snow. The body twitched and the claws retracted. Finally it was still.

“Jo, you okay?” Sam asked as he rolled the furry body off of her. He didn’t know what the hell he was going to do if she was dead.

Her eyes were open, staring up at the night sky filled with stars. He wasn’t sure she was even breathing. She coughed weakly just as he kneeled and bent forward to feel for her pulse.

“It’s so pretty out here at night,” Jo said in a weak voice.

“Where did it get you?” Sam asked, frantically patting her down to find where she’d been injured. This was so much easier when it was Dean, he knew Dean by heart. But that didn’t matter now, Dean wasn’t here, he wasn’t the one that was hurt. _Focus Sam Focus_ , he told himself. He needed to find where she was hurt.

“Nowhere, pretty sure it just knocked the breath out of me, at least I think so,” Jo said, her voice still weak.

“Stand up and I’ll believe you,” Sam said, sitting back on his haunches and brushing the snow off his knees.

Jo struggled to sit up and yelled out in pain, flopping back and moaning.

Sam’s hand found it then, the lower part of her belly was soaked with blood, he could smell it now. “Jo, you’re really bleeding, I gotta put pressure on it, try and get it to stop. Brace yourself, it’s going to hurt like a bitch.” He yanked his wool scarf off and folded it up, pressing it down into her belly.

She held in her yell, but just barely, straining at the edges to stay still and quiet. Her eyes were big with fear and pain, the small puffs of breath as she panted, fast and shallow surrounded her face like a personal fog bank in the cold air.

“It’s gonna be okay, Jo. I’ve got you,” Sam said, because what the hell else was there to say at this point. He had to handle this, had to save her, had to make it right if he could.

“Bet you say that to all the girls,” Jo said in a halting voice, fading out to a pained whisper.

“Where’s your car? Is it up the hill from here?” Sam asked, guessing that she’d parked further up the road and run downhill towards the beasts and him.

“Yeah, not too far—k.k.k…keys are in my pack,” Jo said.

Sam was even more worried now that her teeth were chattering like that. Sure it was cold out here, but it was shock from the blood loss that was already coming in fast. He grabbed the keys out of her pack and found a sweater, he bundled it up against the gaping wound and wrapped his blood-soaked scarf around her body, tying it tightly to hold it on. “You have to keep pressure on this, as much as you can. I’m going to carry you.”

She nodded, eyes bright with pain, groaning and yelling just once as he hoisted her up into a bridal-style carry. He started walking as fast as he could, the crunch of his boots in the snow sounding very different now. These things hopefully didn’t hunt in pairs was a thought he allowed to come and go as he concentrated on keeping them moving forward.

“Hang in there, Jo. I think I see your car, we’re almost there,” Sam said. There was a glint of metal ahead, a vaguely car shaped mass against the white of the snow.

“Dean’s ssstupid,” Jo said in a near-slur. “About girlsss I mean.”

“Yeah, he really really is,” Sam agreed, hoping to keep her talking until he got her to a doctor. He got her in the passenger seat, buckled the seatbelt tightly over the blood-soaked sweater and crossed his fingers she’d stay upright and alive for the drive. Jo’s Subaru started right up and the four-wheel drive bit into the snow, solid and steady on the road. Sam thanked whatever was watching over them that he didn’t have to fishtail his way down the mountain in the Impala or the wreck he was currently using.

“I thought he…you know, I thought he and I might…” Jo said drifting off her head sliding against the window.

“Jo, Jo, you gotta stay with me. We’re almost down the mountain. Don’t sleep yet, Jo, stay with me,” Sam said, shaking her shoulder and pulling her upright again.

As they rounded a tight turn, she fell over on him, her head landing in his lap. Sam touched her cheek, she was so cold and so very still. He felt for her pulse and was relieved to feel it under his fingers. There was a blanket in the back seat and he reached back to grab it, tossing it over her. He one-handed the steering wheel while he tucked it around her. Maybe it would help with the shock. The heater was already set on max, but it wasn’t keeping up with the cold.

Sam drove faster down the small mountain road than he wanted to, but at least he had a destination in mind. He’d seen a small hospital on the way in and figured they probably had some surgery capability. Just one of those things you notice and keep track of as a hunter. Lucky for Jo this rinky dink little town was a ski town, and idiot skiers were always breaking their legs. As he’d driven past it this morning, he’d hoped he wouldn’t have to go there. But…here he went.

“Jo, we’re almost there. Please don’t die on me,” Sam said, patting at her cheek, not really slapping her, but hoping to get her awake enough to communicate at least.

Jo stirred, her head rubbing back and forth across his thigh. “You’re ssso big, why’re you sssso big, Ssssam, huh?” Jo slurred, her eyes shut tight.

Sam didn’t know what the hell to say to that one.

“Your brother is so pretty, but you’re just so big, could climb you like a tree,” Jo murmured.

“If you get out of this hospital in one piece, and you still want to give it a try, I’ll take you up on that,” Sam said, petting at her hair in the hopes that it would be at all comforting. “C’mon, Jo, don’t sleep yet.”

“Didn’t know, after the demon possession thing, if you were ever going to…if I could ever. We never said anything about it. I was messed up for a while after that,” Jo said, sounding a little more coherent.

“I bet you were, I was too, really messed up. I wish I could go back and undo all of that, I’m sorry that Meg hurt you. I’m even more sorry that I let her,” Sam said.

Jo tried to shake her head, but just rubbed her face on his leg again. He was ashamed at how good it felt to have someone touching him. He’d been denying himself human contact for a while now and he let himself soak up the feeling, no matter how desperate. “No, Sam, not your fault, c’mon you know that.”

Sam snorted at that, everything about that whole thing was his fault. She had no freaking idea. If she’d ended up randomly meeting Dean tonight, she’d have heard chapter and verse on that subject by now.

“Did you really let the devil out, Sam, was it really you? That’s what Meg said you were going to do. That’s what all the hunters have been saying at the Roadhouse lately, that you did it, and that’s why things are so weird.”

“I…uh, yeah I did let him out. I thought I was keeping him in, I let myself believe I was doing the right thing. I should have stopped, should have listened to Dean. I just wanted to get them all back for what they did to him,” Sam said, suddenly wishing she wasn’t talking so much.

“While he was stuck in Hell you mean?” Jo asked.

“Yeah, it was bad, worse than you probably know or can imagine. But it’s Dean’s story to tell if he ever wants to tell you, I guess. It made me blind for revenge right from the start, and I got pretty messed up while he was gone. He got ripped up right in front of me,” Sam said, thinking back to that horrible day.

Jo didn’t say anything for quite a while. She took in a big halting breath and blew it out slowly like she was trying to control the pain. “It was Lilith, right?” Jo asked at the end of the outgoing breath.

“Yeah, Lilith, I killed her and that was what let Lucifer out of Hell,” Sam said.

“Shit,” Jo said.

“Yeah, shit was just the beginning of it,” Sam said.

“You ever think about just giving it all up? Quit hunting?” Jo asked.

“That’s what I was supposed to be doing, when I went to Stanford. Didn’t exactly work out the way that I planned. And even now, when Dean and I split up, I said I was out of hunting,” Sam said.

“What’s with you and Dean anyway?” Jo asked.

“It’s complicated,” Sam said, turning into the hospital driveway, concentrating on the glowing red signs pointing him towards the ER.

“Lovers quarrel?” Jo teased, groaning as Sam eased them over a speed bump.

“Hilarious, Jo, really,” Sam said, hoping that non-denial denial would work. Like he’d already answered, it’s complicated, the thing, non-thing he had with his brother. But that was not what he should be thinking about now, he had to get her into the hospital entrance that was right up ahead.

Jo tried to laugh, but groaned as she coughed.

“Look, here we are, I’m pulling up right to the ER door. Hang in there, we’ll get you in there, get you fixed up.”

“Sam, you’re nothing like him, not even close,” Jo said, clutching at his sleeve weakly as he helped her out of the car.

“Like who, Dean?” Sam asked, trying to keep her talking as he scooped her up once more into a bridal-carry. He stepped through the ER automatic doors and searched for anyone. A nurse scurried around the desk towards him and motioned him to an empty gurney up against the wall.

“No, the devil, or the anti-christ, or any of the things the hunters at the Roadhouse were callin’ you,” Jo said.

“Well, thanks I guess,” Sam said.

“If you were evil or bad, you would have left me to die in the snow next to those monsters. You’re not one, I don’t care what anyone says about it.”

“I’m not one what?”

“A monster, you…are…not a monster, Ssssam…” Jo slurred his name as she passed out on the gurney.

“Sir, what happened, sir, are you okay or are you injured as well?” The nurse asked.

Sam wiped his face clear of the sudden tears that had surprised him, Jo’s absolution had hit him harder than expected. How he’d wished to hear those words from Dean flashed through his mind. He roughly shoved that away into the corner where all those thoughts scrabbled and fought with his self-doubts and misplaced rage.

“Uh, yeah, I’m okay, no injuries,” Sam said. “She…she’s going to be okay, right?”

“It’s a big wound, and from the looks of it, a lot of blood loss. As long as there’s no internal injuries, she should be okay. We won’t know for sure until the surgeon is done stitching her back together. Take a seat in the waiting room, and one of the admins will come talk to you,” The nurse said, rolling Jo’s gurney off through the automatic double doors that closed with a hiss.


	2. Chapter 2

*****

Sam crumpled into one of the most uncomfortable chairs he’d ever had the misfortune to find himself in. You’d think they’d spare a thought for the worried people waiting on their loved ones. Jo wasn’t really a loved one, more like a liked one if that was a category. He thought back on the last time he’d been in an ER, waiting to hear if Dean was going to pull through or not. And this—this was not that, not at all. He should probably feel badly about that, because he cared about Jo, but he knew, in the privacy of his own thoughts, that if it had been Dean in surgery right now…

He briefly contemplated calling Dean, telling him what was happening. But Dean had made it clear, he didn’t want that anymore. No more contact. Sam thought about calling Ellen, but decided to wait until he had more information on how Jo was doing. He didn’t want to have to explain his failure to keep Jo safe, and Dean’s absence to her. He pulled out his cellphone, still considering and was surprised to see the missed call alert. He pressed the buttons to listen to the voicemail and held it up to his ear.

Dean’s voice was there, warm and real in his ear, sounding a little drunk, and more than a little sad.

“Sammy, ‘m just callin’ to say Merry Christmas. I hope you’re out somewhere, having fun tying one on with a Santa’s elf or two. Miss you, little brother.”

Sam’s heart filled up with too many feelings all at once, he dropped the phone back into his pocket and put his head in his hands, closed his eyes and thought back to last Christmas. Dean’s last ever, or so they’d both thought. And now he was here again for another one, and Sam wasn’t with him, and nothing was right. Nothing would ever be right until he fixed it back to how it was supposed to be. The devil put back in his cage, and Dean back at his side.

The seat next to him was filled with someone. Sam peeked to the side and saw a large, matronly woman with a name badge, she must be the night admin.

“Hi there, sir, you brought in the woman with the animal wounds?” The woman asked, shuffling the papers on the clipboard on her lap.

Sam clenched his hands around his face briefly, and then let go, sinking into character to b.s. his way out of this situation. “Yeah, that’s my little sister in there, how’s she doing?” He read the name tag on her ample bosom and made sure his face was doing the right thing.

“I’ll have an update for you in a bit, they’re still working on her in surgery,” Marge said. “Until then, I’ve got some paperwork for you to work on.” She handed him the clipboard and a pen with the hospital name on it. Mercy something something. Always with the mercy, just not when it came time for the hospital bills to get paid. He took the clipboard and tried to focus on filling in the forms. He had no idea about Jo’s medical history or if she had insurance. Maybe he should call Ellen after all.

He dug his phone out of his pocket again, hesitated for a second and pressed the buttons to hear the voicemail again. Hearing Dean’s voice made it seem possible to get through this. He dialed Ellen’s number, she didn’t answer so he left a message. Bobby was next, he picked up and sounded half in the bag, but it was late at night on Christmas. Bobby at least had an insurance number for Sam to put down. The forms filled out, he brought them up to the front desk and handed them over to Marge. He noticed the Christmas smock she wore, and the reindeer decorations on the desk, holding the jar of pens.

“Not much of a Christmas, huh?” Marge asked, smiling warmly.

“I’ve had worse believe it or not,” Sam said.

Marge’s eyebrows shot up, but she didn’t ask him to elaborate. “I’ll get this in the system. The nurse just told me, your sister did well and she’s in the recovery room. We’ll get you back to see her in about a half hour.”

“Oh…thank god, thank you so much,” Sam said all in a rush of relief. “I’m going to go get some coffee and come right back.” He walked down the hallway following the signs for the cafeteria. Even though it was the middle of the night, he hoped there was coffee. His phone bleeped at him, vibrating in his pocket. He was surprised there was enough battery left. There was a text message.

Dean: Sammy, you okay? Just heard from Bobby

Sam sighed and ran his hand through his hair. He hadn’t thought about telling Bobby to not call Dean.

Sam: I’m fine, Jo’s doing okay according to the nurse.

The three circles danced as Dean typed and un-typed whatever he was struggling to say.

Dean: Did you get my voicemail?

Sam: Yes, Merry Christmas to you too

The three circles danced some more.

Dean: I didn’t think I’d get another one

Sam: Me either

Dean: I didn’t think I’d be alone

Sam: Me either, but you thought it’d be better this way, right?

Dean: I did, but I’m

Sam: You’re what?

Dean: Night, Sammy

Sam: Night, Dean

That was that on that. Sam found himself some coffee, it was boiled down to a thick tarry dredge, but it woke him up enough to get through the next hour sitting by Jo’s bedside waiting for her to wake up.

“You’re here?” Jo asked.

Sam woke up out of his doze and smiled at her. “Of course.”

“Thanks,” Jo said, closing her eyes, she shifted in the bed and groaned.

“You had surgery, don’t move around too much yet,” Sam said.

“Thought I’d killed that thing,” Jo said. “Good thing you were there.”

“We had each other’s backs, and the thing is dead, that’s what counts,” Sam said.

“You call my mom yet?” Jo asked.

“I did yeah, I left her a message last night,” Sam said. “I got an insurance number for you from Bobby.”

“Oh great, so the whole damn hunting world already knows I fucked up yet again,” Jo said.

“You did not fuck up, Jo. If it’ll make you feel better, Dean says hi and he’s glad you’re okay,” Sam offered.

“Sam, what I said back there up on the mountain,” Jo said.

“I’ve already forgotten it all, and I’d never tell him, don’t worry,” Sam said.

“You must get sick of it, girls throwing themselves at him all the damn time,” Jo said.

“Oh, I’m used to it by now,” Sam said.

“But it’s complicated,” Jo said. “Thanks for staying, but you can go now, Sam.”

Sam laughed and gave her a grateful smile. He stood up and stretched, then leaned over and gave her forehead a quick kiss. “Get some rest, Jo.” He left her car keys on the table along with her back pack.

As Sam walked out of the hospital the sun was just coming up. It felt like it was even colder than last night, and he had to get back up on the mountain to get his car. He got out to the main street and stuck his thumb out, it just didn’t seem right to steal someone’s car on the day after Christmas.

As he rode up the mountain in a stranger’s work truck, he thought about how he knew he’d made the right choice to get out of hunting, but he was never going to feel right about being separated from Dean. But there was no easy medium, no in-between place where that could happen for them. It was all in or nothing, and for now, nothing was it.  
  
 _The End_


End file.
